Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Almost 51

Michael Jackson died last week at the age of 50, just 7 weeks from his 51st birthday. Billy Mays died on Sunday at the age of 50, just 3 weeks from his 51st birthday. So what? So I know someone else who's turning 51 (and so do you!) and this bird ain't happy about the current trend!

The next 6 days can't pass fast enough. I've got to succeed where Michael Jackson and Billy Mays failed. I've got to reach 51!!!




Important FYI for the slow among you, as well as for the Caput Penitus Culus crowd (sorry, that's redundant). This post is meant to be satirical. I do not think that just because two celebrities died before reaching 51 that I'm in some sort of danger of not making it myself. I just thought it would be good for a laugh.

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Monday, June 29, 2009

Lurch attempts humor; hilarity ensues

Everyone knows someone who just doesn't have a sense of humor. That's not to say that they don't laugh at jokes, or participate in banter. It's that they are genetically incapable of saying anything funny. Ever. Their every attempt at humor is clumsy, fumbling, and ends with either a thud or in offending someone.

John "Lurch" Kerry is one such individual. Every attempt at humor he has made in his entire life has landed with a thud. This one was no different.

Sen. John Kerry added to his long list of lame joke attempts yesterday when he wished South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford's disappearance on Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin.

Speaking to some business and civic leaders he had invited to Washington, Kerry quipped: "Too bad if a governor had to go missing it couldn’t have been the governor of Alaska. You know, Sarah Palin."
Ponderous. F-ing ponderous.

To her credit, Sarah Palin was much funnier in response.
Today, while speaking to Alaska National Guard troops in Kosovo, Palin joked that she actually felt bad for Kerry as she watched his attempt at humor.

"Then Senator John Kerry makes this joke � I don't know if you saw this, but he makes this joke saying, 'Aw shoot, of all the governors in the nation who disappeared, too bad it couldn't have been that governor from Alaska . . .'"

"But the way he said it, he looked quite frustrated and he looked so sad. I just wanted to reach out to the TV and say, 'John Kerry, why the long face?'"
Ha! Long face! Now, THAT'S funny.

Someone needs to take Lurch aside and gently tell him that he's about as funny as cancer, and he needs to stop trying to make jokes. Because, with his every attempt, he shows what a joke he himself is.

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Sunday, June 28, 2009

Wiener of the Week

What can you say about legislation that was passed in a giant-ass hurry so that Nancy "Air Force 3" Pelosi could go on vacation? What can you say about legislation that the House Minority Leader called a "pile of shit"? One last question: what can you say about legislation that creates a massive tax increase that accomplishes absolutely nothing?

You say, "Congratulations, Congress! You're the Wiener of the Week!"

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Thursday, June 25, 2009

Ron Paul speaks

Ron Paul is like E. F. Hutton to me: when he speaks, I listen. If you get the reference to E. F. Hutton, then you're old, just like me.

Ron Paul is now officially on the record in declaring that Il Duce and Congress are trying to trigger an economic collapse.

“An economic collapse seems to be the goal of Congress and this administration,” Paul said during his weekly radio address Monday.

“Washington spends with impunity, domestically bailing and nationalizing basically everything they can get their hands on,” Paul said.
So far, so good. But he's just getting warmed up. Now he takes on one of government's sacred cows - the International Monetary Fund.
Perhaps most outrageous, Paul said, is the $108 billion loan guarantee to the IMF.

“These new loan guarantees will allow that destructive organization to continue spending taxpayer money to prop up corrupt leaders and promote harmful economic policies overseas. Not only does sending American taxpayer money to the IMF hurt citizens here, evidence shows that it even hurts those it pretends to help.”

Paul said that IMF loans require policy changes called “structural adjustment” programs, which amount to “forced Keynesianism.”

“This is the very fantasy-infused economic model that has brought our own country to its knees,” Paul said, “and IMF loans act as the Trojan horse to inflict it on others."
Preach it, brother man! Such a pity no one is listening.

And now for the coup de grace.
“We are buying nothing but evil and global oppression by sending [our] taxpayer dollars to the IMF — not to mention there is no constitutional authority to do so.”
Amen.

Why don't we have more men like this in Congress? WHY?!?!?!?

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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Bad Law - Update

I received an email from a gentleman named Simon Owens who runs a blog called Bloggasm. He pointed me to an article he wrote in which he interviewed one of the lawyers who is defending four of the anonymous commenters (see previous post) whose identities Der Staat is attempting to subpoena.

Please check out the linked article; excerpts don't really do it justice.

And Simon: thanks for the heads up. The more people aware of this miscarriage of justice the better.

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Bad law (and the Culusotti who love it)

I'm sure that the crowd over at Caput Penitus Culus will love this one. Or not.

A Nevada newspaper says it has been served a federal grand jury subpoena seeking information about readers who posted comments on the paper's Web site.

The Las Vegas Review-Journal reported Tuesday that its editor, Thomas Mitchell, plans to fight the request, which the newspaper received after reporting on a federal tax fraud case against business owner Robert Kahre.

The subpoena seeks the identities and personal information about people who posted comments on the story. The newspaper said prosecutors told the judge in the case that some comments hinted at acts of violence and the subpoena was issued out of concern for jurors' safety.

Mitchell said anonymous speech is "a fundamental and historic part of this country." The newspaper would consider cooperating if specific crimes or real threats were presented, he said.
If the Review-Journal is unsuccessful in fighting this unquestionably unconstitutional request, it spells curtains for the entire concept of protected free speech. Because, as you know, Der Staat can find just about ANY reason to justify ANY action once "precedent" (or case law) has been established. Right, Culus?

On the one hand, you would think that the law fetishists at Caput Penitus Culus would be overjoyed at the prospect of law being defined. It's how they get their jollies, apparently. But there's a small problem with this particular issue: everyone, from the Caput a Palo to the n00biest commenter, posts at that site under cloak of anonymity (or at least pseudonymity). The lame-ass excuse offered by the Caput a Palo himself for not associating his real name with his blog was that he was afraid of the FLDS. Seriously? I'm MUCH more afraid of Culus and his proto-authoritarian jack-booted Hitler youth than I would EVER be of the FLDS. What are they going to do? Bore me to death with Book of Mormon readings?

Object lesson, Culusotti! Just because something becomes case law doesn't make it right, just, or constitutionally valid. Perhaps having a legal issue decided in a way that harms your precious anonymity might open your eyes to that fact.

Eh, probably not. They're not terribly bright over there...

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Monday, June 22, 2009

Wiener of the Week

My favorite tool of Der Staat (and I do mean tool) is at it again.

A lawsuit filed Thursday against the Transportation Security Administration alleges a Ron Paul supporter was unreasonably detained at the St. Louis airport because he was carrying about $4,700 in cash.

The organization had hosted an event in St. Louis that included the sale of tickets, T-shirts, stickers and other materials and Bierfeldt said he was carrying the cash proceeds in a metal box when he was detained at Lambert Airport for about 30 minutes on March 29.

The lawsuit does not seek money but asks the court to declare the TSA's actions unconstitutional and to prohibit the agency from similar searches when there is no evidence aircraft are endangered.

Bierfeldt's attorney, Ben Wizner, said the lawsuit does not challenge TSA's authority to search and detain those suspected of taking weapons, explosives or other dangerous objects onto planes.

"That's the whole purpose of airport searches," Wizner said. "These are not, however, open-ended criminal searches."
That last sentence sums it up in full: the TSSA (Two 'S's because you can't spell Schutzstaffel without the 'SS') has NOT been granted the power to conduct open-ended criminal searches, nor to harass US citizens just because they feel like they can.

TSSA - you're the Wiener of the Week.

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Friday, June 19, 2009

A visual is always good

For those who haven't figured out the damage being done by the DoublePlusGoodHopeChange.



Wow! Not even I drive THAT fast!

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Wednesday, June 17, 2009

At least it's out in the open now

From The Drudge Report:

On the night of June 24, the media and government become one, when ABC turns its programming over to President Obama and White House officials to push government run health care -- a move that has ignited an ethical firestorm!

Highlights on the agenda:

ABCNEWS anchor Charlie Gibson will deliver WORLD NEWS from the Blue Room of the White House.

The network plans a primetime special -- 'Prescription for America' -- originating from the East Room, exclude opposing voices on the debate.
Hey, why not broadcast from the White House? Why not show what Ken McKay of the RNC called 'an informercial' hawking the snake oil that is government health care? Why not exclude those who oppose Postal Service-style health care? I mean, c'mon! How could anyone stand in defiance of The Anointed One?

It's not like ABC was ever in the tank for a president before. Oh, wait! They were all up Clinton's butt, too. Never mind.

I'm sure the only reason that the other networks and print media are upset about ABC's actions is because they're not invited to kiss the feet of the Holy One as well. It's not like they have any REAL issue with what ABC is doing. They just feel left out.

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Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Must be the Padre Kino

Fred Reed is an old curmudgeon. Like me. Only older. Naturally, I love the stuff he writes.

Fred was a reporter in some of the most dangerous places on Earth; Vietnam, Cambodia, the Middle East, Ward 8 in the District of Columbia. Fred has seen it all. So when Fred has a take that's 180 degrees tilted on its head from my take, I notice. And I listen.

Yesterday I went on ad nauseum about Fascism 2.0 Amerika. Fred sees it ever so differently. To him, this isn't textbook Fascism, Socialism, or any other "ism". No, this is something new and unique.

OK, a brief excursion into cosmic truth. First, socialism. Hard-line conservatives with little grasp of economics refer to anything they don’t like—Hillary, national health care, regulation of anything if it might cost them money—as “socialist.” It’s a utility pejorative, devoid of meaning, as “racist” and “elitist” are for political south-paws. Socialism is of course a system in which the government owns the means of production. Check your dictionary.

Ah! But in America, the means of production own the government. Inverted socialism it is. Here is a far better thing. If you are a means of production, anyway.
Okay, let me see if I get this. This isn't business in bed with government cooperating as a means of saving their skin. This is business DRIVING government. This is business as boss, not government.

Heavy stuff, man. Heavy.

Now, I'm not entirely sure I'm 100% with Fred, because I don't believe for a second that ANYONE tells Der Staat what to do. What I think is afoot is a situation where Big Business THINKS it has government by the tail and under its control. Only one day in the not-so-distant future, they'll awake to the reality that they've sold out their country and their very lives to the Almighty State for a few measly depreciating dollars, as Uncle rears his ugly head and lays waste to those who think to tell him what to do.

But then, my mother always told me I'm so full of crap my eyes are brown, so what do I know?

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Monday, June 15, 2009

Fascism for Dummies

I've grown tired of having to provide a parenthetical or footnoted explanation every time I describe the current direction of our country as Fascism. I wouldn't have to, except that, as a result of the dumbing-down of 4 generations of public school graduates, people have no clue what the word really means. To most, the word is synonymous with repression. While repression was a major component of nearly all Fascist regimes, that isn't the sum of what Fascism was and is.

This post is my attempt to enlighten the dumbed-down as to what Fascism really is so that they don't resort to the kind of knee-jerk emotional response most commonly associated with calling someone a Fascist.

Fascism, or Corporatism, as it is sometimes called, can be described thusly.

[A] system of economic, political, and social organization where corporate groups or interest groups, such as business, ethnic, farmer, labour, military, or patronage groups, are joined together under a common governing jurisdiction to try to achieve societal harmony and promote coordinated development.
I would condense that wordy definition even further: Fascism is the marriage of government and corporations whereby the means of production are owned jointly in a private/public partnership. Think of it as oligarchy-friendly Socialism.

Socialism? But Vulture, isn't Fascism an ideology of the Right? That would be 100% wrong. 60+ years of disinformation have resulted in most people associating Fascism with the Right, when, in fact, it is most commonly identified by its adherents as the "third way" alternative to Communism or Capitalism. The third way....hmmm, wasn't that Clinton's pet identifier for his policies? But I digress...

Fascism is, by point of fact, a Leftist ideology, falling somewhere on the political spectrum between Democratic Socialism and Communism.

Fascism has been attempted - always with predictably bad results - in Italy (1920's-1940's), Germany (1930's-1940's), Spain (1930's-1970's), and Argentina (1950's). Spain? Argentina? Nobody told us about THAT in public school. No shit! That's because, for whatever reason, our "betters" want us to associate Fascism with brutal totalitarianism and attempted world domination as demonstrated by the Third Reich and the Italian Fascists. While it is true that both the Argentine and Spanish Fascists were authoritarian and repressive, neither attempted world domination and both were extremely popular with the so-called "workers".

So the next time I speak of Fascism, I won't be using parenthetical explanations nor footnotes. I'll simply link back to this post. I want it understood when I say that King George the Dim and Il Duce led this nation into Fascism I'm referring to things like the government take-over of the banks and auto industry and (coming soon to a Fascist nation near you) health care.

That and nothing more.

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Wiener of the Week

Some might wonder why I seem to have little respect for science. Perhaps if Big Science didn't make grandiose pronouncements regarding how we little people should live, only to reverse course and say "never mind" later, I might respect them a little more. Case in point:

You worry a lot about the environment and do everything you can to reduce your carbon footprint -- the emissions of greenhouse gases that drive dangerous climate change.

So you always prefer to take the train or the bus rather than a plane, and avoid using a car whenever you can, faithful to the belief that this inflicts less harm to the planet.

Well, there could be a nasty surprise in store for you, for taking public transport may not be as green as you automatically think, says a new US study.

Its authors point out an array of factors that are often unknown to the public.

These are hidden or displaced emissions that ramp up the simple "tailpipe" tally, which is based on how much carbon is spewed out by the fossil fuels used to make a trip.

Environmental engineers Mikhail Chester and Arpad Horvath at the University of California at Davis say that when these costs are included, a more complex and challenging picture emerges.

In some circumstances, for instance, it could be more eco-friendly to drive into a city -- even in an SUV, the bete noire of green groups -- rather than take a suburban train. It depends on seat occupancy and the underlying carbon cost of the mode of transport.
Uh-huh. And just like that, 40 years of undeniable "fact" is washed away.

Congratulations, Big Science! You're the Wiener of the Week.

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Friday, June 12, 2009

Checks and balances, anyone?

Contrary to what morons like King George the Dim say, the US is NOT a democracy. Our founders were smart enough to realize that the inborn flaws of democracy are insurmountable. Democracy is two wolves and a sheep voting on what's for lunch. Sucks to be the sheep...

No, our founders established a republic. And not just any republic! They specifically shackled the federal government with a set of rules under which it could operate (the Constitution) and established a series of checks and balances to ensure that one branch of government wouldn't run roughshod over the other two.

It worked REALLY well for about a decade. Then the Supreme Court ruled that it was the sole arbitrator of constitutionality....and suddenly one of the balances was heavily skewed in their direction. It's no wonder that the courts are the authoritarian's first choice for ramming through all manor of unconstitutional BS. After all, this oligarchy of seven pretty much gets to decide the legality of everything, unchecked.

To be fair, the courts have served as a check to presidential aspirations on occasion. Think about how messed up we'd be if the Supreme Court of the 1930's hadn't shot down so much of Roosevelt's overreaching!

But with Il Duce, it's different. Just as the press gives him a free ride - nay, even CHEERLEAD for him! - so too the Court has given him a pass.

In spite of the fact that Delaware law is being violated by Il Duce's handling of the Chrysler fire sale to Fiat, the Court refused to hear a plea to reject it.

Two things. First, the Court has handed a blank check to a megalomaniac. Il Duce has control over major banks and 2 of the Big 3 auto makers. Add the Supreme Court to that list.

Second, the Court has abrogated its responsibility to protect US Citizens within the rule of law by allowing this sale. A provision of Delaware law which guaranteed in the neighborhood of 90% of invested dollars for certain classes of investors like pension funds in the event of Chapter 11 bankruptcy was turned on its ear by the Obama "The American people UAW comes first!" plan.

There's an additional ripple effect beyond the hit the pension funds have taken. Do you think for one minute that foreign money is coming to American markets now that the rules have suddenly become moot? If Delaware laws protecting investors can be steamrolled by the current Fascist* administration, what other laws protecting investors will be ignored? I know if I were a European investor, I certainly would avoid investing in US markets now!

Small investors, pension funds, and 401(k) funds, their portfolios already in the toilet (my 401(k) was down 40% the last time I looked), will be even further slammed as a result of this non-ruling.

It's no wonder the conspiracy theorists are having a field day with this administration. The only people who would perpetrate the abortions of common decency and common sense that this administration has committed are the truly stupid, the oblivious, the brain dead.......or those who wish to see this nation and its economic vitality destroyed.

Personally, I think the Obama administration is a mixture of all of those elements.

* I hate to have to run this disclaimer every time I use the word "fascist" or "fascism", but we live in an age where the word has become synonymous with repression. When I speak of fascism, I speak of a governmental/economic system that includes the public/private ownership of the means of production. That and nothing more.

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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

American Jews in Israel

...for the fail. Nice use of logic, reason, and the powers of persuasion. (Warning: EXTREME profanity).









Funny...didn't ya'll vote OVERWHELMINGLY for him? I sense a disconnect...

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When reality collides with dogma

Yeah, about all of that man-made global warming...please explain this, if you would.

One of the reasons for this could be colder-than-normal weather across the northern tier of the country that has suppressed the number of thunderstorms and has significantly reduced the number of tornadoes this year. The number of reported tornadoes so far this year is 685, just over half of the average annual amount, which is 1,297.

According to Long Range Expert Joe Bastardi, areas from the northern Plains into the Northeast will have a "year without a summer." The jet stream, which is suppressed abnormally south this spring, is also suppressing the number of thunderstorms that can form. The ones that do form in areas of the Ohio Valley and West are forming in places with very cold temperatures, which can lead to more electrified thunderstorms than normal this year. (emphasis mine)
I see. So I'm to believe that warming is causing extreme storms in the Atlantic to the point of downing aircraft (see yesterday's post). But...the reality is that a very large swath of the US could end up with abnormally COLD weather. I'm so confused...NOT AT ALL.

Kinda hard to keep your storyline of eminent doom from warming alive when people are freezing their butts off...

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Monday, June 8, 2009

Okay, now they're just being stupid

Not even as cynical a bird as I would have thought that Big Warming could be this shameless.

As the investigation continues as to what brought down the French airliner over the Atlantic Ocean with 228 people on board, a Russian climatologist believes global warming played a significant part.

Kokorin said that global weather conditions are becoming more severe, and the cause goes back to one source: the acceleration of the greenhouse effect due to the activities of man on earth.
Pardon me while I pick myself up off the floor after ROFLMAO.

This guy is no scientist; he's an availability entrepreneur, just like Al Gorebells. He's trying to make a buck off of an unscientific but potentially lucrative scare scam. The whole global warming crowd is analogous to a bunch of long-haired dudes in robes standing on the side of the road with "Repent! The end is near!" signs.

And I, for one, am sick of their tired act.

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Sunday, June 7, 2009

Wiener of the Week

This WotW falls under the category of "are you REALLY surprised?"

Highly sensitive details of a US military missile air defence system were found on a second-hand hard drive bought on eBay.

The test launch procedures were found on a hard disk for the THAAD (Terminal High Altitude Area Defence) ground to air missile defence system, used to shoot down Scud missiles in Iraq.

The disk also contained security policies, blueprints of facilities and personal information on employees including social security numbers, belonging to technology company Lockheed Martin - who designed and built the system.
This is our beloved government at work. They can't protect our State secrets...but we're supposed to believe that they can run the automobile industry, run the health care industry, and provide all of the "green" energy we could ever want. It could happen! (And pigs could fly out of my ass...)

Congratulations, Uncle! You're the Wiener of the Week.

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Friday, June 5, 2009

In case you needed further proof

"The terrorists hate us for our freedoms". That was King George the Dim's favorite saying. What a putz! The LAST thing we are is a free people.

Don't believe me? Then check out how San Diego deals with that pesky 1st Amendment.

A local pastor and his wife claim they were interrogated by a San Diego County official, who then threatened them with escalating fines if they continued to hold Bible studies in their home, 10News reported.

Attorney Dean Broyles of The Western Center For Law & Policy was shocked with what happened to the pastor and his wife.

Broyles said, "The county asked, 'Do you have a regular meeting in your home?' She said, 'Yes.' 'Do you say amen?' 'Yes.' 'Do you pray?' 'Yes.' 'Do you say praise the Lord?' 'Yes.'"

The county employee notified the couple that the small Bible study, with an average of 15 people attending, was in violation of County regulations, according to Broyles.
Okay, let's review, shall we?
  • A small prayer meeting held weekly in a private residence.
  • They pray. They say 'Amen'. They praise the Lord.
  • San Diego County wants to shut them down.
This is the sort of thing for which we (rightly!) condemn Communist China. Only now it's happening -- openly -- in Police State Amerika.

Remind me again about those 'freedoms' we're hated for...

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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

A racist, anti-freedom horror show

Judge Sonia Sotomayor is Il Duce's nominee for the Supreme Court to take the place of that moron David Souter. As one would expect, only the finest legal expert, selected on the basis of merit, not quotas, would be Il Duce's first Court nominee. NOT AT ALL.

Sonia Sotomayer represents all that is wrong with our judicial system. Her demeanor in the courtroom is that of a tyrant and a bully. She is anti-freedom, ruling against both freedom of speech and the Second Amendment.

But the one thing about Sotomayor that stands out? That would be her racism.

Oh, come on, Vulture! You really can't use one throw-away paragraph in one speech to label a person as a racist! But that's the thing: I don't. I couldn't care less about that speech. When I speak of Sotomayor as a racist, I'm talking about more important, more substantial things, like this:

As an undergraduate at Princeton, this nominee to the Supreme Court wanted the government to require the school to hire more Hispanic faculty members. At Yale Law School, she bemoaned a court ruling against racial quotas. She hasn't seen nearly enough affirmative action to please her, and as a judge has repeatedly cited her own special understandings as a Latina as a reason for putting more Hispanics on the bench.

So what's wrong with any of this? Nothing, if all she was doing was calling for an end to ethnic, gender or racial discrimination against people who are imminently qualified as faculty members or judges or whatever. Instead, she was calling for preferential treatment on the grounds that there is something better about one group than another, much the same philosophy once used to justify slavery, lynchings, segregation and all kinds of injustices against blacks in this country.
That's not enough for you? Try this: Sotomayor belongs to La Raza, Spanish for "The Race". Last I heard, excessive racial identity was a prime element of racism. And La Raza is an anti-American organization as well.
La Raza was condemned in 2006 by former U.S. Rep. Charles Norwood, R-Ga., as a radical "pro-illegal immigration lobbying organization that supports racist groups calling for the secession of the western United States as a Hispanic-only homeland."

Norwood urged La Raza to renounce its support of the Movimiento Estudiantil Chicano de Aztlan – which sees "the Race" as part of an ethnic group that one day will reclaim Aztlan, the mythical birthplace of the Aztecs. In Chicano folklore, Aztlan includes California, Arizona, Nevada, New Mexico and parts of Colorado and Texas.
Hey! I have relatives in Aztlan! And they don't speak Spanish! [/sarcasm]

And let us not forget Sotomayor's prominent position in the case of the firefighters denied promotion because no minority candidates passed the test.

With all of the heat generated from that dopey quote from that dopey speech Sotomayor gave in Berkeley, Il Duce's consigliere was called upon to set the ground rules for opposition.
White House press secretary Robert Gibbs issued a pointed warning to opponents of Judge Sonia Sotomayor’s Supreme Court nomination Wednesday, urging critics to measure their words carefully during a politically charged confirmation debate.
"You have a nice face. It would be a shame if something happened to it..."

Face it, Il Duce has produced exactly the kind of Court nominee Team Elephant was screaming about during the 2008 Elections. Of course, in the interest of fairness, I have to point out that McCommie wouldn't do much better. Maybe we'd get "son of Souter" from him, if we were lucky.

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Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Wiener of the Month - June

Well, it's finally official - GM has filed for Chapter 11 protection. So you think that they're the WotM, right? Wrong!

Trust me, I'm not about to defend the mindless way the scavengers at the top of the corporate ladder ran the company into the ground. But they had help. LOTS of help. In no particular order, these are the contributors to GM's passage from Corporate Titan to fully-owned subsidiary of the United States of America.

  1. Labor Unions. It's not bad enough that unions destroyed the US steel industry. No, they won't be satisfied until every manufacturing job in the nation is priced so high that the corporations have no alternatives; it's either go offshore, go to Uncle for bailout cash, or go under.
  2. Earth worshipers. It just wasn't enough for these assclowns for the Big 3 to build automobiles with low exhaust emissions and gas mileage numbers that dwarf the best numbers from the 1970's. No, the Gaia crowd kept crying for more, more, more. These people will never be satisfied. Even if the only thing coming out of tail pipes were water, they would bitch because the water wasn't clean enough.
  3. Activists. Ralph Nader alone brought about a number of expense-adding regulations -- granted, some very import, live-saving ones, to be sure. But the cost of satisfying all of those regulations also contributed to the Big 3's inability to compete with imports, whose labor cost per vehicle is so much lower than Detroit's. And yet, Mr. Nader had the quiñones to write this drivel chastising GM! A bowling alley doesn't have the balls this man has!
  4. The media. Can you remember the last time you read ANYTHING positive about any of the Big 3? I'm guessing it was the mid 80's the last time I did. And let's not forget that fat ass oxygen parasite Michael Moore and all of the negative press he brought to GM.
  5. The government. Politicians chasing the Union and tree-hugger vote bent over backwards to saddle the automobile industry with one regulation after another. And now, Obama owns the company. Thanks, Il Duce!
As a result of all of this "cooperation", the Wiener of the Month for June is shared among GM and the 5 major contributors to its fall from grace.

Congratulations, Wieners. You all suck!

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Monday, June 1, 2009

Wiener of the Week

Either Robert Gibbs is one funny dude, or there's a problem here.

The United States is facing its biggest financial crisis in ages. North Korea is blowing up nukes. Dick Cheney warns us of the "dangers that have not gone away." And there are still wars raging in Afghanistan and Iraq.

But over in the White House press briefing room, it’s a veritable laugh riot.

Whenever there’s laughter in the James S. Brady Briefing Room — by either the briefer or the briefed — the official White House stenographer indicates as much by inserting “(Laughter.)” into the transcript.

And in Robert Gibbs’ first four months as President Barack Obama’s press secretary, there have been more than 600 instances of “(Laughter.)” during his regular press briefings — an average of more than 10 laughs per day.

It’s a gaudy statistic — and one that puts his predecessors to shame.

Dana Perino, George W. Bush’s last press secretary, got all of 57 laughs in her first four months. Scott McClellan, another Bush press secretary, got just 66 laughs in his first four months.

Gibbs even bests the late Tony Snow, whose jocular performances — dubbed “The Tony Snow Show” by some — drew a relatively paltry 217 laughs during his first four months on the job.
Insert laughter here.

Gee, is Gibbs really THAT funny, or is the press joviality a product of the fact that their guy is seated in the Oval Office? Hmm....that's a tough question....NOT AT ALL!

Congratulations, lap dog media - you're the Wiener of the Week.

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