Monday, February 15, 2010

Not amusing

Okay. I’ll admit it. I laughed when I heard the story.

Two Tennessee women who accused a man of rape have admitted to cops that they had consensually agreed to sex with him in exchange for a pack of cigarettes. One woman told investigators that the duo filed a phony police report because they "didn't enjoy the sex," according to cops.
You have to admit, the image of these two heinous water buffaloes prostituting themselves for cigarettes, then claiming rape before owning up to their fraud is chuckle-worthy. That is, until you think through the consequences that potentially faced the poor gentleman (and, boy, do I use THAT term loosely) who managed to achieve and maintain arousal with those two fugly hosebags.

Two counts of rape. The average sentence for an individual convicted of rape is 11.8 years. A casual interwebs search found sentences between 11 and 20 years for two counts of rape.

"Oh c’mon, Vulture! There’s no way he would have been prosecuted!" Really? You’re telling me that some Mike Nifong wannabe wouldn’t press charges? You’re telling me that some unscrupulous prosecutor wouldn’t hide exculpatory evidence to ensure that their "won-loss record" wouldn’t take a hit? You’re telling me that a jury of "his peers" (read: people not smart enough to get out of jury duty) couldn’t be persuaded by an emotional pair of women tearfully recounting how this man had "deflowered" them?

In 21st century America there is NO situation where being charged with a crime is the slightest bit funny. Because in 21st century America our tangled legal system seems to be designed to make criminals of us all rather than to assure the safety of the citizenry. And in that sort of legal system, no one is safe from malicious, fraudulent, or mistaken prosecution. No one.

So laugh if you will at the hideous HURTings now charged with filing a false police report. But I’m not laughing. Not as long as our system of laws is as effed up as it is right now. Not as long as innocent people can have their lives ruined by false allegations in a system run amok. And certainly not as long as people like this can practice law.