Tomorrow is promised to no one

Last Thursday Donna got news that the husband of a former coworker had died of a massive heart attack. Dude was only 57.

DP, Hope, and I went to the viewing on Sunday. It was really sad to see such a young widow, especially considering how much she loved and was devoted to her husband. They literally did everything together. Now she's alone.

As tragic as his death was, it could have been prevented or delayed. Dude was at LEAST 50 pounds overweight - maybe 75. All that extra weight is murder on the human heart.

Not to be preachy, but if you're packing some extra pounds, think about a widow in her early 50's who lost the love of her life. Think about the people you'll leave behind when you die young.

That said, it's not like being thin is a guarantee you'll live to be 100. Tomorrow is promised to no one. So love the people you love as hard as you can for as long as you can.

Holla at a Brotha

Recently I've noticed quite a bit more traffic on the blog than in weeks past. It seems that some of my friends and family are starting to succumb to their curiosity. They want to know exactly what kind of infantile ranting goes on around here.

Sadly, the only ranting so far has been mine, DP's, and TJ's. I would very much like to encourage you to leave your comments. Tell me I'm full of it. Tell me I'm brilliant and/or awesome. Tell me off. Just tell me SOMETHING.

I've noticed that some people HAVE tried to use the comments - but somehow those comments aren't being posted. I suspect that there is a disconnect caused by the way the page is laid out by the Blogspot developers. I have to scroll down to see the options for my user id or nickname, for whether I want notification of response via email for my comments, and to click "Post". I suspect that some of you are missing this half of the page and your brilliant (or insipid) comments are being lost. So....not to treat you like idiots, but here's the "hold your hand" tutorial of how to post replies to my nonsense.

1) Click the "Comments" link.

This is one of the goofy things about Blogspot. Instead of a link that says "Click this to post/reply" it says "0 Comments". So, click that dopey thing to insert your comments.

2) The Comments Popup - Part I

This, to me, is the problem. Why isn't there the ability to bring up this popup sized properly, or at least make it resizable? I believe this is where some of your comments are getting lost.

Once you're here, enter your enthusiastic commentary. Verbiage such as that in the sample to the right is recommended.

Now scroll down to the part where it says "Choose an identity", and we'll continue with Part II.


3) The Comments Popup - Part II

If you have a Google account of any kind (gmail, etc.), sign in as that id.

Otherwise, click the little radio button above "Nickname:", then type in a nickname that you will uniquely identify you within this blog (for example, DP chose the nickname "Roadkill" in keeping with the Vulture theme. Do you see why I love her so much?).

Optionally, you can click the box next to "Email follow-up comments..." to receive notice when someone (probably me, but perhaps some other brilliant person from the WWW) responds to what you have written.

Now, the most important thing. Click "PUBLISH YOUR COMMENT".

Failure to do the two mandatory steps (identify yourself and click the "publish" button) is going to cause your brilliant comments to be lost forever.

I love that more and more people stop here to check it out. But I really want to hear from you.

Wiener of the Week

After careful consideration, I determined that no one deserves a Wiener award more than Microsoft. Vista is the single worst POS ever foisted on an unsuspecting public. It refuses to recognize my new camera. It refuses to recognize my new mp3 player. It takes 15 minutes to print to a shared printer unless I go through excruciating lengths to find the back-end, hacker-devised way to make it work like XP does.

Here's the rub - I'm what's known in the world of computing as a "power user". That is, I know my way around a computer. I can do my own software installs and upgrades. I can add components to the machine. I dare to update the registry manually and programatically. I write computer programs, both simple and complex. So, if I'm having problems with Vista to the point where I'm cursing and pulling out my hair, what are the mom-and-pop users who can barely access their email going through? I don't even want to think about it.

Newer isn't always better with software. Vista is newer...but it's the pits. Do NOT upgrade to vista unless someone puts a gun to your head.

Microsoft, for creating the single worst POS operating system software EVER, you are my Wiener of the Week.

Superman wears Bob Sanders Underwear

There is a fad, rapidly spreading across the wondrous Internet, the gist of which is to lionize the greatness of an amazing individual. It started with Chuck Norris (sample: There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist).

This year, two new legends emerged: Bob Sanders and Ed Hochuli.

I'm definitely a fan of the genre. It makes me ROFL. Click the links and enjoy the show.

Upon Further Review

After my Mike Martz rant was posted yesterday, I went out to one of the many fanzine blogs to check out what the rest of the 49ers Faithful were saying about the hire. The tone of initial posts was unhappiness, though not NEARLY as unhappy as I was.

But then, as people started to bring up different facts about Martz and his tenure in St. Louis and Detroit, I started to come around to the thought that maybe this wasn't such a bad hire after all.

Two things changed my mind. The first was that way that Martz has taken ordinary quarterbacks (or even sub-ordinary) and turned them into stars (see: Warner, Kurt and Bulger, Mark). Second, I had forgotten how Marshall Faulk went from being a top-10 NFL running back before Martz came to St. Louis to Hall of Fame caliber during the Martz years. Marshall AVERAGED over 2,000 yards from scrimmage per season under Martz until Father Time finally took him down. Can you imagine Frank Gore as "Marshall Faulk"? I can. Of course, trying to see Alex Smith or Shawn Hill as "Kurt Warner" takes a little work...

But I'm still not sold on how much impact Martz can have on the team because of the utter lack of talent at the wide receiver position. Until we pick up some WRs, we're going to continue to be a futile offense.

Oh, Mr. Martz. I apologize for my rant of yesterday. I promise to give you the benefit of the doubt from now on.

49ers Fan Angst

Tuesday ESPN reported that the San Francisco 49ers have name Mike Martz as their new Offensive Coordinator.

When asked for a comment, the Vulture replied in an expletive-filled rant. The following has been sanitized, since this is a "family" blog.

Mike mother{bleeping}ing Martz?!?!?!?! Are you {bleeping}ing kidding me?!?!?!? {bleeeeeeeeeeeep}!!!!! Are the York's purposely trying to destroy the franchise, or are they just that {bleep}ing stupid?!?!?!

The Niners have one - ONE - offensive player who's worth a damn, and he's a RUNNING BACK! Mike mother{bleep}ing Martz is pass-first, pass-second, oh what the hell, let's pass again. Can you imagine the offensive ruin that will be when pitiful Alex Smith tries to run the Mike mother{bleep}ing Martz offense with that gawd-awful cast of wide receivers? Meanwhile, Frank Gore, a top-10 NFL running back, will be PASS BLOCKING for this cluster {bleep}.

The Niners have endured a team-record 5 losing seasons in a row. 2008 will make 6.

This was once the preeminent NFL franchise, the team against which all others were judged (and found wanting). Now it's a bumbling laughingstock, run by morons. Eddie D - WE NEED YOU!!!!!

No small animals or children were harmed in the course of this rant.